Hello everyone, it's me again.
Long time no see? I suppose that's my fault, I just haven't been feeling very inspired to blog or write lately.
When I sat down at my desk with my laptop this morning I decided to check out some blogs (something I haven't done in a long time), it made me realise how much I've neglected my own blog. I started it because I'd been reading design and inspirational blogs for about a year, and thought it looked like a good idea. I also thought I'd be able to share my ideas with everyone and inspire people, that's kind of my dream. To inspire people. Anyway...
...The reason why I haven't really bothered with blogging is because I've just been feeling so overwhelmed lately (I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?). My teachers are burying us 6 feet under unnecessary assignments and homework. It's like, all of a sudden, they've decided to bombard us with stuff we don't even need to know. I know I sound petty and childlike, but do we really need to know Pythagorus's Theorem or remember all the scientific elements? I want to be an author & journalist, so my vote is no. We don't need to know this stuff. Sometimes it's helpful, but basically everyone I know has no future career aspirations to become a mathematician or scientist. I will admit, however, that I love science. haha:)
What else has kept me from blogging? Hmm. I guess it's all the drama that accompanies being a high school student; boys, cat fights, rumours. And to be honest, I'm completely over it. I'm completely over my friends complaining about boys not liking them back or being assholes. A lot of the time guys will be assholes, they don't mean to be, but they will be. It's the same with girls, there will be bitches, there will be girls you want to just punch in the face, there will be girls that are very unwelcome in your life. We all have to learn to deal with the fact that not everyone is going to be really nice to you, there will be some people that you won't be able to trust in life. Yes, this is one of the most important and valuable things you will ever learn in life, but nevertheless it's a pain in the ass.
*I've kind of been ranting, should I continue? I don't really know...*
Feeling overwhelmed is one of the most fickle emotions you have to deal with in life. Sometimes you barely have anything to deal with; one assignment, and one fight with an acquaintance. Sometimes you could be dealing with everything at once; boys, school, work, friends, family, and it's just too much. I love that feeling *extreme sarcasm*. About a week ago I kind of had a break down, it was a point in my life where all my friends were fighting and excluding me, all my teachers were giving me a hard time, and I just got annoyed at everything. I do realise that all the things I deal with aren't that significant, that there are thousands of people alive today that are going through hell, or at least their own personal version of hell. I didn't share the things I was going through with anyone because of this one thought running through my head: There are 3 types of people: those with no problems, those with many, and those with just a few but not enough to actually be worthy of anyone's time. I've always fallen into the last category, and sometimes I feel like that's the hardest thing to deal with. I can't burden people with my problems because it will either seem like I'm complaining about nothing, or making others feel bad. But I want to tell you all this, I want everyone that comes across this post/blog to read this. Just because you don't think your problems matter, or just because you think you shouldn't bother people, doesn't mean anything. If you're having troubles dealing with stuff, talk to someone because they will care. I did know this, a good friend told me this, but it made me feel guilty. I was taking up their time with my own stuff.
Please, please ignore that bitch of a voice inside your head if it ever says this. You aren't taking up their time because they offered to listen. You're strong for dealing with everything, but even the strongest warriors or most intelligent philosopher needs someone to rely on. Maybe that's true strength: admitting you aren't strong enough to deal with things on your own, trading in a small slice of your pride for your sanity.
This has been a pretty deep post, but I'm feeling better after writing it. I hope I was able to offer some guidance to the few that do read my blog, and I hope that I helped out those that just stumbled over it. I love you all, and until next time...
~Au Revoir!~
